October 9, 2007

Downside of life

***I feel HORRIBLE ***
I hate myself for not being able to run as fast as I could..as far as I could..but I know, it's my fault. I haven't been working out or training for the past 2 years. I should run more often to get back my stamina and speed.
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This evening, Diego, Stefan, Shino and I went running around campus..down Dickson Street to Maple St, then all the way back to Yocum. I thought it would be easy but I was wrong..when the cool air started blowing in my face, I had a hard time breathing properly. My head was pain and dizzy..I need the warmth air!!! I miss the warmth of the air I feel everytime I ran..It was so cold and I was trying to keep up with them. But the coldness doesn't seem to bother any of them. Maybe it's just me. Maybe because I'm always under the hot sun. Maybe I just need to get use to the coolness here instead of walking around in jacket. Maybe, just maybe. However, one thing is for sure, I need to start working out again. I'm so out of shape. I need to get fit again. I need to go running and swimming every week. I'll try my best to accomplish this before winter comes and I freeze to death..haha..I hope my friends won't think I'm such a lousy person...I just hope so..hoping and wishing upon the stars..
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I have 4 exams this week..one today and 3 more to go! I need to study but yet I'm here..I'm just too tired to study but I need to..I need motivation..I need my friends being around me, encouraging me and helping me everytime I surrender to my feelings..everytime I feel like giving up just because I feel like doing it..I miss you all from A-Levels!!! I miss the time we studied together in the library. I miss the time we play around and just hang out after studying..I miss the time we spent at the A-Levels office, trying to get our info right..trying to get tips from our lecturers..I miss...People here are more self-orientated I guess..I miss those little things my friends and I used to do and talk about.. This is how I look like..and I need to study..*sigh* I pray that God will bring me through all these exams this week..I'm tired..



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