My dreams had been really weird for the past few days. I thought I would not have these sort of dreams anymore since it's been a while since then. It was dark and everyone was dressed up for some party or so. We were at a Christian event and we were having a great time before we heard people coming towards our direction. It was a whole bunch of Antichrist ppl, led by a big lady. The lady looked familiar in a way or so, but I have no idea who she is. Behind her was a really big group of people, some of whom are our friends, each holding some kind of stick and weapon. They looked scary, for sure! Everyone of us panicked and started to pray for help and guidance. We started running through this building and we were trapped. People who were captured by the Antichrists were tortured and beaten to death. It was a horrifying scene. I couldn't wake myself from the dream and it felt horrible. Then, as we run and pray, we came to a sewage hole and that was our only way out of this . We had no choice but to go through it. It was our only hope of survival, hoping there is a way out of this. However, as we go through the sewage hole and out into the open, we found ourselves surrounded by another group with whips and sticks..it was just bad! We were beaten and blood was everywhere. As they were hitting us, they kept asking if we still believe in Jesus and if it is worth it. That point, many were dying in pain. All I remember was just kept praying and believe that God is near. Psalms 23 came into mind and I finally woke up! It reminded me of the importance of building a strong relationship with God, esp in this day of life. Anything could happen and no one knows when the end of days would come. It is a horrible and scary thought to know that not even The Son of God and the Holy Spirit know the exact moment of it, but only the Father does. It is not a pleasant thought to know the days of torture and misery is near but to have faith and know that God will never desert any of us is a comfort. The first thing I did when I woke up was to check myself if it was a dream or reality.The dream was so surreal that it messes one's mind. Not only did this dream stopped, it continued last night when some of us had escaped and survived the beatings and tortures and went into hiding. Some of us were found and killed and yet some survived. I woke up couple of times; yet, the dream kept continuing as I fall back asleep. It makes me think what is the message that God is trying to tell me. The last times I had these sort of dreams, I knew I had to pray for someone and to strengthen my faith. To come back to the heart of worship and not to lose faith in him. To know HE is always near! No matter what, I will always know God is here, and Psalms 23 is a promise I hold dearly.
***
Psalms 23
The Lord is my shepherd,
I shall not be in want.
He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,
he restores my soul.
He guides me in the path of righteousness
for His name's sake.
Even though I walk through the valley of shadows of death,
I shall fear no evil,
for you are with me;
Your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
my cup overflows.
Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life,
I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.
***
Not only did my spiritual life was affected these couple of days, so did my physical and emotional life. Yesterday, I went to a chinese church instead of my regular visit to an English speaking one, just to give it a try and to see how God has work there. I know God has blessed their church and that He is there in their presence. However, what I realized was the humanly part. Males and females sat separately in that church, unless they were married couples. It was as if everyone knew that it was not acceptable or something. I was the only one who wasn't doing that since i was sitting with my guy friends who brought me there..That was one observation. I had a hard time understanding the sermon since I had limited chinese vocabs compared to the rest and the translator was having a hard time translating..but that wasn't what bothered me. As the translator stopped, I could hear music playing in the background of the mp3 used for translation. I could hear Mariah Carey's "Touch my Body" at the back of her translation. That shouldn't happen at all. How can such song be played esp in a church? That kind of song is just degrading and meaningless..Maybe they didn't realized, but it was inappropriate regardlessly.
Then in the afternoon, I learnt more about traditional thinking, something that I had never ever give in to all my life. Something that no one could ever try make me do, being traditional..I went to my friends' place to eat before we head to Wilson Park for some sports. [purely jogging and basketball?]There were 4 chinese guys and I was the only girl since I wanna tumpang car to go there. So..after eating, some of the guys told me to wash up and I was like "ya, I'll wash mine, don't worry.." and then they were like, "no, you have to wash up everything..bla bla bla.." and I kinda just ignore them and just wash mine [sort of, since I didn't know what to use in their kitchen] and headed to use the internet on my laptop..then after a while, after everyone else ate, the last guy [let's say A] washed up everything else that was left..and B was talking to C saying "Look, A is washing up everything..a guy washing up and the girl sitting here doing something else..girls nowadays" [paraphrase] Oh, anyone who knows me well enough knows never to comment that in front of my face. I kept silent since it wasn't my house and I didn't really know B well enough to scold him..but that did pissed me off..I mean, c'mon, not everyone thinks like that! Everyone should clean up after themselves. This is US, not China..even if it is, bare in mind that i am MALAYSIAN CHINESE, with the MALAYSIAN as my nationality. Guys and girls should help out in everything, there's no such thing as what girls are to do and what not..not to me! If this happens again, I will not be silent anymore...sigh..I have never met anyone like this before, at least not a young person..I could understand if he's an old man or something but not when you're 21 or so..so, let me put this out there, don't tell me what I CAN do and CANNOT do as a girl..don't push me around because I'm a girl! Females and males are equal! That is what I was brought up thinking and believing..
For the past year I'd been here, I'd learnt a lot about how traditional some can be and how modern some are..some I find amusing and some are logical in a sense. However, forcing a tradition on someone else is not cool. Not at all. I can accept certain comments and requests but I do have a limit too. So does my patience even though I am patient with others most of the time.
***
All in all, my summer has been somewhat interesting so far..haha..if i can say so..
Psalms 23
The Lord is my shepherd,
I shall not be in want.
He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,
he restores my soul.
He guides me in the path of righteousness
for His name's sake.
Even though I walk through the valley of shadows of death,
I shall fear no evil,
for you are with me;
Your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
my cup overflows.
Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life,
I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.
***
Not only did my spiritual life was affected these couple of days, so did my physical and emotional life. Yesterday, I went to a chinese church instead of my regular visit to an English speaking one, just to give it a try and to see how God has work there. I know God has blessed their church and that He is there in their presence. However, what I realized was the humanly part. Males and females sat separately in that church, unless they were married couples. It was as if everyone knew that it was not acceptable or something. I was the only one who wasn't doing that since i was sitting with my guy friends who brought me there..That was one observation. I had a hard time understanding the sermon since I had limited chinese vocabs compared to the rest and the translator was having a hard time translating..but that wasn't what bothered me. As the translator stopped, I could hear music playing in the background of the mp3 used for translation. I could hear Mariah Carey's "Touch my Body" at the back of her translation. That shouldn't happen at all. How can such song be played esp in a church? That kind of song is just degrading and meaningless..Maybe they didn't realized, but it was inappropriate regardlessly.
Then in the afternoon, I learnt more about traditional thinking, something that I had never ever give in to all my life. Something that no one could ever try make me do, being traditional..I went to my friends' place to eat before we head to Wilson Park for some sports. [purely jogging and basketball?]There were 4 chinese guys and I was the only girl since I wanna tumpang car to go there. So..after eating, some of the guys told me to wash up and I was like "ya, I'll wash mine, don't worry.." and then they were like, "no, you have to wash up everything..bla bla bla.." and I kinda just ignore them and just wash mine [sort of, since I didn't know what to use in their kitchen] and headed to use the internet on my laptop..then after a while, after everyone else ate, the last guy [let's say A] washed up everything else that was left..and B was talking to C saying "Look, A is washing up everything..a guy washing up and the girl sitting here doing something else..girls nowadays" [paraphrase] Oh, anyone who knows me well enough knows never to comment that in front of my face. I kept silent since it wasn't my house and I didn't really know B well enough to scold him..but that did pissed me off..I mean, c'mon, not everyone thinks like that! Everyone should clean up after themselves. This is US, not China..even if it is, bare in mind that i am MALAYSIAN CHINESE, with the MALAYSIAN as my nationality. Guys and girls should help out in everything, there's no such thing as what girls are to do and what not..not to me! If this happens again, I will not be silent anymore...sigh..I have never met anyone like this before, at least not a young person..I could understand if he's an old man or something but not when you're 21 or so..so, let me put this out there, don't tell me what I CAN do and CANNOT do as a girl..don't push me around because I'm a girl! Females and males are equal! That is what I was brought up thinking and believing..
For the past year I'd been here, I'd learnt a lot about how traditional some can be and how modern some are..some I find amusing and some are logical in a sense. However, forcing a tradition on someone else is not cool. Not at all. I can accept certain comments and requests but I do have a limit too. So does my patience even though I am patient with others most of the time.
***
All in all, my summer has been somewhat interesting so far..haha..if i can say so..
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